What if this season of “I don’t know” is making things I can’t see happen.

07.19.2021

Journal Entry from The Porch Swing


What if this season of “I don’t know” is making things I can’t see happen.
.
This picture was taken in a
season of deep grief and loss. I was a girl standing barefoot in a river, my soul screaming to hold something still. This photo shoot has become a type of vulnerability my heart needed to bare, because the dust of my heart was blowing away from me like a whisper in the wind.
.
I couldn’t see it then.
.
My desperation to make things easier than what they were during the season of,
“I don’t know,” was that girl standing barefoot in the river.
.
I was being tasked to
*trust. I was trying to *fix something I couldn’t fix. And, I was pouring myself inside out holding onto what was my idea of how my life was supposed to look.
.
And then, when I had enough of rowing myself in circles, I lifted my hands off of those wooden boat oars. It (and still does) felt like a free fall.
I felt a release. Permission. To just be still.
.
What if, I don’t have to do anything. My task was / is to stop trying to figure it all out.
.
What if, my task is to enjoy the view.
What if my task is to walk through those season(s) of “I don’t know,” hands off those wooden oars, head up, soaking in the whimsy and wonder of all the life moments. Even when I just don’t know.
.
.
.
And, when you’re ready, I’ll be here, friend, awaiting you to join me here on, The Porch Swing, where healing happens.
.
#theporchswingkc #wherehealinhappens #kctherapist #kansascity #healingjourney #jesus#vulnerability #writersofinstagram #womensupportingwomen#widow #traumarecovery

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